1-1-1: my secret to a healthy social battery
read about how I balance my life, what self care really means, and other ways to tangibly improve your life.
november, 2023
edition 42.
I have no idea what is going on with me but I am feeling FERAL and like a MENACE with soulcycle right now — I am leaning heavily into soulcycle as a form of working out and for community and I love it. (that being said, it could also be the turn it up challenge and my need to complete 10 rides in the last few days of the challenge because I love a challenge… the marketing team needs a frickin raise)
other updates is that reading truly has taken a backseat in my life right now. while I’m frustrated and upset because I haven’t finished a book in over a month, I also realise that’s not my priority right now.
which, actually, perfectly segments me into this week’s newsletter about balance. look at me (1) having themes for my newsletters again and (2) actually scheduling the podcast for this week and next week because I’m getting BACKKKK on the grind!
hope you enjoy this one lovelies xoxoxo
you can expect one email from me every week containing:
one quote that has been inspiring me
one journal prompt
one piece of advice*
* = if you want to submit a question for my upcoming emails, you can find the form here.
podcast
new episode about balance and priorities — listen to all my past episodes here <3
one quote
“I TOOK CARE OF MYSELF and it wasn’t beautiful.
I took care of myself and looked at the overdue bills in the face, even though it hurt. I took care of myself and cried ugly through the therapy session; made another appointment for next week. I put in the work and wrote all the bad memories in detail. I apologised to all the friends I didn’t have the energy to talk to. I finally cut off all my dead ends and bought produce; slimly avoided sustaining myself on barbecue chips and poetry. I recycled. I set an alarm for 8 hours of sleep and did not sleep more or less.
I took care of myself and it wasn’t bubble baths. it wasn’t lotion at bath and bodyworks and three-cheese pizza. it was uncomfortable.
it wasn’t beautiful, but I am, and it didn’t have to be beautiful to be worth it.”
—schuyler peck, the greatest act of self-love isn’t always pretty
one journal prompt
what are 3-5 things I consistently do that deplete me of energy?
one piece of advice
“Can you give advice on maintaining a healthy and thriving social battery? I'm an introverted extrovert but this imbalance in my social battery got me confused.”
suchhh a good question especially since I’m learning how to balance it all right now (and I just filmed a podcast episode about social life balance this week! so if you want more in depth thoughts/my experience with it, go listen ;))
for reference, I’m also an ambivert but I lean 60 introvert 40 extrovert. remember that this is a reference to how you recharge and not necessarily how you show up in a social setting!
all of that being said, here are my quick fire tips:
it is healthy to have multiple friend groups and individual friendships with people in your friend groups — make sure you are prioritizing both group friendships and individual friendships
schedule in weekly reoccuring events!
for example, I have a standing thursday dinner date with one of my friends here in london to cook/chill
it’s a ‘we’re doing this every thursday unless something comes up on either end’ rather than a ‘we should do this some time but we’re going to be bad at actually co-ordinating that time
make sure you have schedule time (1-2 nights in a week is what I’m aiming for atm) for you time to rest and recharge however that means for you
for me, I like to take a bath esp if I have sore muscles, turn on my ambient light, and read before bed!
remember that quality > quantity, and that the only way to truly deepen a friendship is spending time with them. if you feel like you’re spreading yourself out too thin, maybe re-evaluate the friendships in your life and which ones you want to invest in right now
realise that this is a fluid process and it will change with the seasons (or sometimes without reason — wow I’m a poet) so don’t feel bad if you have to distance yourself from a friend for whatever reason
if you find yourself feeling drained after seeing certain people or being in certain situations (e.g. drinking or partying), take note of that. maybe you find that your connections and friendships are best built in another setting/with other people
remember that saying ‘yes’ to something social means saying ‘no’ to something else —> other plans, other people, or time with yourself
not everything has to be a social event! it is healthy to have time alone
hope this is helpful <3 but I would highly rec listening to the pod if you have an extra 20 or so minutes!! it goes into this concept more in depth and I talk about my own experiences as well!
reading updates
currently reading: seven days in june by tia williams, babel by r.f. kuang, iron flame by rebecca yarros
finished this week:
KATIE FINISH AN ACTUAL BOOK CHALLENGE! (IMPOSSIBLE)
if you want to keep up with my reading throughout the week, this is my goodreads :)
enjoyed this edition?
until we meet again,
katie
hey Katie!! hope ur doing great! i love the quality>quantity tip. it really resonates with me, because often times I would feel guilty for not doing multiple outings and hang outs with my friends when in reality it really isn't about how many times i hang out with them, it's all about making the most out of our time when we're together, also my efforts to connect with them and keep in touch with them. ur not the only one who's setting back reading . me too. i'm going through a reading slump.