1-1-1: the secret to never burning out

read about my theory on balance and use the journal prompt to take immediate action today!

Oct 29, 2024

october, 2024

edition 52.

idk if I will ever *not* talk about how I am struggling with priorities and balance in this part of the newsletter but PLS lol why is being in your mid-20s so hard !!! like some people are getting married and some people are running marathons and some people are earning six-figs and I’m just here like :D

but as october comes to a close, I’ve been reshuffling my priorities (as I mentioned last week!) and seeing what in my life is staying for nov / what I am sadly dropping :( I talk a little bit more about my version of balance in the advice portion of this newsletter so I will shut up ab it here now

something else I am incorporating is time blocking my calendar — not only is it super pretty but it also feels like an effective way for me to manage my time! so perhaps we will have some updates on time blocking soon?!

either way, I hope everyone (had) (is having) (will have) a good halloweekend. stay safe n spooky! and let me know in the comments what you’re dressing as this year !! <3

you can expect one email from me every week containing:

one quote that has been inspiring me
one journal prompt
one piece of advice*

* = if you want to submit a question for my upcoming emails, you can find the form here.

podcast

there are tons of guest episodes on the podcast from 2024 that are worth checking out — listen to them here <3

one quote

“I hope you understand that we are not meant to live a life that we need a break from. we are not meant to live a life that drains our energy and leaves us feeling tired. we are not here to survive, we are here to live.”

—unknown

one journal prompt

[read the advice section first, and then come back to answer this:]

based on your current long-term goal, what two areas are you going to focus on this season?

one piece of advice

“how do you balance health and fitness with school and college work?”

I feel like balance is something I speak a lot about on this newsletter/the internet in general and, even though I’ve been on this ‘wellness journey’ for years, it’s something I still struggle with. in lieu of a sleepy bedtime conversation I had with the boy yesterday, let me attempt to answer the question of balance once and for all:

I. why do we feel ‘out of balance’ all the time?

I have a theory that we feel all out of wack when our priorities shift (a big change is often a catalyst for this) and our previous understanding of balance doesn’t apply anymore. what worked for you previously isn’t working now. when this happens, I get so so frustrated with myself because I assumed I had it ‘all figured out’ by now. this may be true for our previous priority, but with a new priority comes a new understanding of balance.

you see, balance isn’t giving every part of our life an equal share of our time and attention, it’s giving it an equitable share.

with each long term goal, there are obvious areas of our lives that need to be prioritized for that season. if you’re trying to ace your exams, you’re probably spending time studying. if you’re trying to hit a new PR in the gym, you’re focusing on lifting multiple times a week and recovering well.

once you achieve that goal (you get the promotion or you finish taking your exams), your previous lifestyle will feel weird. why would you spend the majority of your free time studying if you’ve already taken your test? are you going to go to the gym with the same intensity once you’ve hit your goal? the answer is, maybe not. so you’ll feel out of balance, and you’ll reshuffle what aspects of your life you’re giving your attention to.

II. so what does balance really mean then?

life can be split up into three large categories: (1) social life, (2) fitness/health, and (3) work/school. you can do 1 extremely well, 2 pretty well, and 3 disastrously. when we expect to pour our energy into all three categories at the same time, that’s when we hit burnout.

you can have everything you want, but the tradeoff is that you can’t have it all at once.

for example, you can be disciplined with your health and do really well in work, but your social life might suffer.

you can maintain friendships and excel in school, but your discipline with health and wellness may suffer.

in each season of your life, my theory is that you can choose a maximum of two areas to focus on. the key to balance isn’t what two areas you choose (that’s personal and highly dependent on your short and long term goals), but the acceptance that the third area in your life will be put on the back burner as a result.

a more personal example (going off of last week’s newsletter about getting my phd… maybe…): from now until early spring, I am choosing to pour into my work/studies and my overall health. this means that my social life is taking a hit. I’m not connecting with peripheral friends as much as I would want to; I’m not responding to my texts in the most timely manner; I’m not trying out new cafes or restaurants in london. what I am doing is making sure I am physically and mentally prepared to ace my GRE. I’m chatting to people who are currently in or have graduated from programs I may be interested in. I’m pouring time and effort and energy into my long term goal of getting into grad school (again), and making sure I have enough energy to do so.

this is such a learning process and I am, by no means, an expert on balance. if you read my past newsletters, you’ll see that balance and priorities is something I tend to struggle with the most and talk about most often. this is just a short peek into my growing theory on balance !!

reading updates

currently reading: lies and weddings by kevin kwan, slow productivity by cal newport, born a crime by trevor noah

finished this week:

how the king of elfhame learned to hate stories by holly black (#3.5)

reading challenge: 41/50, on track

if you want to keep up with my reading throughout the week, this is my goodreads :)

discount codes

these links are affiliate which means I'll earn commission if you purchase through them. thank you for the support!

FreeSoul: 15% off with code katieeu
D.Louise: 15% off with code katieeu
lululemon: my current list of favourite things (aff link)

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